Title: What She Left Behind 2/3
Author: Michelle
Email: mrsdrake@sff.net
Date: July 2004
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Buffy/Giles
Summary: Giles deals with Buffy’s death and return
Setting: End of season 5 and beginning of season 6
Disclaimer: These are not my characters. They belong to Joss, Twentieth Century Fox, UPN, WB & Mutant Enemy. This is purely for fun.
Author’s note: This is a backup fic for the Allthejellies Angstathon. It will be either two or three parts when complete.
My assignment was:
1. lj/name: aaronlisa
2. season: Post season 5/Early season 6
3. rating: (If you want a NC-17 rating then you must have a season 3 (post-birthday)requirement or higher.) any rating is fine
4. 1 thing you don't want: (This is something that you don't want in the fic written for you...like slash, Riley, etc.) No Riley
5. 3 things you do want: Giles copes with Buffy's death and then return due to the spell in Bargaining
* * * * * * * * * * *
Giles emptied the box, throwing away the packing material. He placed the pictures in various places around his apartment. Since Buffy was in every photo, he would see her in every room. She was pictured with friends and family in all of them, except one. That one he placed next to his bed. It would be the first thing he saw in the morning, and the last thing he saw at night.
The stake and wooden crosses he place with his own weapons. She would want them to be used.
He opened the small box containing a simple gold cross. He caressed it lightly before removing it from the box. As he fastened the clasp behind his neck, he vowed to never remove it.
He turned his attention back to the empty package. Carefully, he cut the address label from the box, wanting to save everything. He cut the tape holding the box together and started to fold it. As he did, an envelope fell to the floor.
Nothing was written on the outside, but when he removed the pages, he recognized Buffy’s handwriting. He sat down to read her letter.
Giles,
By now you must have watched the tape. I did mean what I said. I love you. I wish I’d told you, but I was afraid. Everyone I love leaves or dies or something terrible happens to them. My dad left, mom died, and everybody wants to kill Dawn.
I know I shouldn’t mention Angel, Parker, or Riley. You know what happened with each of them. I wish I could know if things would have been different for us.
Mom once told me not to close off my heart. So, if we both make it through this alive, I’d like to find out. I don’t even know if you feel the same, but I hope that you do.
You must be wondering how long I’ve felt this way. I wish I could tell you, but I don’t know. I’ve pushed the feelings down for so long, and I didn’t realize I was doing it. When I told you I love you on the tape, I surprised myself. I didn’t even know I had said it until I played the tape back and heard myself say it. I thought about erasing it and starting over, but I can’t. You have a right to know how I feel.
I hope I survive the battle, but I know I probably won’t. Please don’t be sad if I die. Be happy that I saved the world again.
I love you.
Buffy
Giles read the letter several times. “Oh, Buffy. I wish you were still here. You have no idea how it feels without you here.”
He carefully folded the letter and placed it back into the envelope.
“I love you, too, Buffy. I always have.”